Forskjellige Ord og Uttrykk

Ord (Titler, produkter, apparatur, og lignende)

  1. Ulv i forkle
  2. Pølsevrak
  3. Automatspøkelse
  4. Blyant-troll
  5. Arkivheks
  6. Vaffelmonster
  7. Bruktfisk
  8. Melkekartong-ulv
  9. Gåsefjærspekulator
  10. Sivilimpertinent
  11. Slipsmegler
  12. Gapestokkforvalter
  13. Dansbandsmusiksdämpare
  14. Blinklysolje
  15. Grønn overledning
  16. Sleggefett
  17. Halogenvæske
  18. Trollspray
  19. Instant Water
  20. flux capacitors
  21. cable stretchers
  22. steam buckets
  23. elbow grease
  24. light bulb repair kit
  25. Magic smoke replacement kit
  26. Hand-cranked spectrum spreader
  27. Flood-resistant mirror-drilling machine
  28. Frittsvevende integraler
  29. megasær
  30. blystygt
  31. krutt-dyrt
  32. Digitus Impudicus
  33. 5/8-inch flight line
  34. Krisemaksimator
  35. Vaffeljeger
  36. trikotometrisk indikator
  37. rektabulær ekskrusjonsramme
  38. ambihelisk låsemutter
  39. Nullvisjonær
  40. Luftslottsforvalter
  41. Kronespøkelse
  42. Fugleskremselsreparatør

Uttrykk (Ordspill, aforismer, sitater, tungekrøllere, o.a.)

  1. My new years resolution is 1280 by 1024
  2. I have been doing spring cleaning, my spring is now the cleanest in the neighborhood
  3. God is REAL, unless explicitly declared INTEGER
  4. A polar bear is a rectangular bear after a coordinate transform.
  5. It isn't rocket surgery.
  6. The faster I goes the behinder I gets
  7. Betal med peanøtter så får du bare apekatter
  8. Ned og opp som sur melk i en kattunge
  9. Å skrelle banan med motorsag
  10. Nå som vi bruker e-post er det blitt vanskeligere å få skjegget til å sitte fast
  11. Deja vu all over again - Déjà vu nå igjen.
  12. Deja-Moo - that feeling you've heard this bull before.
  13. Deja-Poo - aka I've seen that shit before.
  14. Når skriver Skriver skriver «skriver Skriver», skriver skriver Skriver sin signatur.
  15. Do not remove a fly from your friend's forehead with a hatchet
  16. Wir hab' unseren Metoden.
  17. "METRIC SIGNS NEXT 100 MILES"
  18. «Å bruke penger som en full sjømann.» Merk at fulle sjømenn bruker sine egne penger, og de gir seg når pengene er brukt opp.
  19. Bunny-boiler, kanin-koker (hun koker din kanin = hun er spenna gæærn) (fra Fatal Attraction, popularisert ved Klovner i Kamp)
  20. Tommer og fot er populære måleenheter i snekkerarbeider — er det fordi det ligger igjen mange tomler og føtter rundt omkring pga diverse uhell med kappsagen?
  21. Det eneste som er kult med regninger er at ordet skrives likedan forlengs og baklengs.
  22. Hvem faen er Peer, og hvorfor tilbakestiller han nettverks- tilkoblingene mine hele tiden?
  23. Insights and insults
  24. More I's than in Mississippi
  25. «Mother should I trust the government?» «IKKE FAEN»
  26. Vi har fått oss fast-telefon. Beste anskaffelse på lenge, for nå vet vi endelig hvor den befinner seg til enhver tid!
  27. You can't fix that kind of broken.
  28. June 28 is a perfect day, since both 6 and 28 are perfect numbers.
  29. Oppslag et sted:
    _________________________
    VÆRE SÅ SNIL
    IKKE PARKERE PÅ DØR
    ELLER VI MÅ BÆRE
    VARENE FRA LANG
    stor problem til meg!
    _________________________
  30. The fat lady has been caught singing.
  31. I'm a light drinker: As soon as it gets light I start drinking.
  32. «Stoppeplikt for fotgjenger i gangfeltet. All stans forbudt i og 5 m foran gangfeltet.»
  33. Når den røde tråden er blitt en diger feit trosse.
  34. Risikabelt som biff tartar på koldtbord.
  35. Financial instruments, now playing out of tune.
  36. God always forgives, man sometimes forgives, time never forgives.
  37. If there is an unpardonable sin, it surely must be incuriosity.
  38. When civil servants have become civil serpents...
  39. Build a better mousetrap and patent lawyers will beat a path to your door, carrying cease and desist letters.
  40. If you always do what you always did, you'll always get what you always got.
  41. Ikke drikk saft dere ikke har blandet selv
  42. When the power-meter starts acting like an angle-grinder (Når skiven i strøm-måleren går rundt som var den en vinkelsliper)
  43. I formidabel form i dag formiddag.
  44. "Violence is the final refuge of the incompetent" — Asimov
  45. Hva kom først av Hønen eller Egge?
    (Hønen Gård finnes i sagalitteraturen, den nåværende ble skilt ut fra Hov 1759-10-29. Egge gård i Steinkjer er beskrevet i Snorres saga om Håkon den gode, fra 940. Likeledes er Egge i Lier fra vikingtiden...).
  46. Regnmåler, regnmåler i panelet der,
    hvem er våtest i landet her?
  47. Free as in beer, software, trade, lunch, speech, no longer in jail, nothing left to lose, the cheese in the mousetrap. Choose any of the above.
  48. The elevator company is NOT located in a one-storey building.
  49.  240BC: Everything changes
    1800AD: Time and the tides wait for no man
    1980AD:Shit happens
  50. Det er en grunn til at tryllekunstnere aldri opptrer i bar overkropp.
  51. Det diskuteres om sparepærene er modne, eller om de fremdeles må ansees å være kart.
  52. If it was so, it might be; and if it were so, it would be; but as it isn't, it ain't.
  53. Kaninen har hoppet avgårde og tatt med seg flosshatten.
  54. Fotosyntese er ikke det samme som fremkalling av bilder
  55. På onkologisk avdeling driver de ikke primært med slektsforskning
  56. «Sesjonen Utgått» har ingenting med avtjent verneplikt å gjøre.
  57. War does not determine who is right. War determines who is left.
  58. Gresset er kanskje grønnere på den andre siden av gjerdet, men det må fremdeles klippes.
  59. _________________________
    DISCLAIMER
    We will not be responsible for damage to equipment, your ego, blown parts, county wide power outages, spontaneously generated mini (or larger) black holes, planetary disruptions, or personal injury that may result from the use of this material.
    _________________________
  60. Due to the rising cost of electricity, the light at the end of the tunnel has been turned off.
  61. History belongs to people who turn up for it.
  62. «Høyt skiftesignal» betyr noe annet for småbarnsforeldre enn det gjør for jernbanefolk.
  63. Those folks who run that system on a daily basis know only two things about systems security: (1) diddly and (2) squat.
  64. Peel back the skin of an onion and you have another onion waiting to be peeled.
  65. Tavle for synstest:
    _________________________
    O
    MG
    WTF
    STFU
    PWN3D
    URANOOB
    LMAOROTF
    KTHXBYE:P
    _________________________
  66. Once is happenstance. Twice is coincidence. Three times is enemy action.
  67. Promising unicorns on a wombat budget.
  68. On watching a ship named Unsinkable II you can't help but wonder what happened to the first one.
  69. "In questions of science the authority of a thousand is not worth the humble reasoning of a single individual." — Galileo Galilei, 1564-1642
  70. «Ved å fornekte vitenskapelige prinsipper kan man opprettholde et hvilket som helst paradoks.» — Galileo Galilei
  71. «Visdom begynner med å bruke riktig navn på ting.» (kinesisk ordtak)
  72. Murer murer Murer murer? Ja, murer Murer murer mange murer.
  73. Morning has broken. Would someone, anyone, please put in a work-order?
  74. My get up and go has got up and gone.
  75. VVS-trøbbel: Når innholdet i S treffer maskineriet til V...
  76. «Sky sporten og de alskens rekordene!» — Fridtjof Nansen
  77. »Vi alene vide hvad der er til folkets bedste.« — Fredrik 6.
  78. Der det er røyk, kan det være noen med en stor cigar.
  79. Nostalgia ain't what it used to be.
  80. Your mirror doesn't seem to work. Either that, or I've become a vampire. — million_monkeys
  81. Not only is there the writing on the wall, but the wall is increasing in size and the writing is using a smaller font.
  82. Dårlig selvbilde blir ikke bedre av at man ser det i speilen.
  83. Same plot, different characters, still no happy ending.
  84. «Funksjonen har aldri virket, og vil fortsatt være ute av virksomhet til noen får fikset det.»
  85. "There are two ways of constructing a software design: One way is to make it so simple that there are obviously no deficiencies and the other way is to make it so complicated that there are no obvious deficiencies." — C.A.R. Hoare, The 1980 ACM Turing Award Lecture
  86. Light travels faster than sound. This is why some people appear bright until you hear them speak.
    Better to remain silent and be thought a fool than to speak out and remove all doubt — Abraham Lincoln
    Vanklok mann som vanker ute, det er tryggest han tegjer. At lite han veit, det vitrast ingen, utan for mykje han mæler. — Hávamál 27
    Even a [callous, arrogant] fool, when he keeps silent, is considered wise; When he closes his lips he is regarded as sensible (prudent, discreet) and a man of understanding. — Proverbs 17: 27-28
  87. "It doesn't matter how beautiful your theory is, it doesn't matter how smart you are. If it doesn't agree with experiment, it's wrong." — Richard P. Feynman
  88. Money is power, so it should be measured in dB.
  89. "Spice says that this circuit not only has a rotten tempco, but that it oscillates like a politician." — Bob Pease
  90. Den som får kjeft av alt fra sogneprester til løsbikkjer.
  91. When the shit hits the fan, the man with the toilet paper will be King.
  92. People spend money they don't have when buying things they don't need, in order to impress other people that they don't like.
  93. Ingen kjenner dagen før posten er kommet. (dansk ordtak)
  94. "People are predicting the end of the world like there's no tomorrow." — Leg-Iron
  95. Volumes have many binary divisions with individual names, half of which are forgotten.
  96. It is usually not possible to insist on purity one way or the other without creating monstrosities.
  97. The more laws and orders are written, the more thieves there are. — Tao Te Ching
  98. Imposition of order = Escalation of chaos — Discordian law of Eristic Escalation
  99. THE DIFFERENCE BETWEEN THEORY AND PRACTICE, IS GREATER IN PRACTICE THAN IN THEORY. — AfOR
  100. Man blir inte fet av fett mer än man blir grön av grönsaker. — Christer Enkvist, läkare.
  101. "I wanted to make it do what I wanted it to do, not what the people working at Apple or Android wanted it to do." — Amy Mather on programming the Raspberry Pi
  102. Finn-ansiere: Å selge ting på finn.no for å få inn penger til å kjøpe noe annet.
  103. VI ER STENGET PGV PROBLEM MED TEKNISK STORM
  104. Knowledge is knowing that tomato is a fruit.
    Wisdom is knowing not to put it into a fruit salad.
    Philosopy is wondering whether that makes ketchup or a Bloody Mary a smoothie.
    Common sense is knowing that ketchup is not a smoothie.
    Science is finding out the best recipe for the Bloody Mary
    Engineering is making the equipment to mix this Bloody Mary
  105. If you're not part of the solution you are either a solid or a gas - John Sy
  106. The three laws of thermodynamics:
    (1) You can't win. Energy cannot be conjured from nothing. What goes in is what comes out. TANSTAAFL.
    (2) You can't break even. There will be energy quality degradation. Every time energy is converted from some form to another, some of it is wasted as lower-quality energy, usually heat, which is non-recoverable.
    The energy output realized from any change of states in a system is less than the energy required to bring the system back to the original state, should that even be possible:
    You can't unscramble scrambled eggs. And there is no way to put the magic smoke back into the device.
    (3) You can't even quit. Try not to use energy, try not to spend energy. Stored energy leaks. Chemicals lose their potency with time. Everything put together sooner or later falls apart. Friction and resistance is everywhere.
  107. A necktie is topologically equivalent to both a collar/leash and a noose. This cannot be a coincidence.
  108. I noen tilfeller får man lyst til å sage terningen på tvers for å se om det ligger en null inni. - rosmebraad
  109. Den som graver en grav for andre skal ha 150 kroner i timen.
  110. «Himmel og hav!! Ivar Formo i mål, på gullmedalje!! Ingen makt i VERDEN kan slå ham! Saken er klar!! Saken er BIFF! Saken er KARBONADE! Saken er ERTESUPPE!»
    Bjørge Lillelien, 1976-02-14, da Ivar Formo vant 5-mila i OL 1976 i Innsbruck.
  111. Klasseromsundervisning i ABC på rekruttskolen er noe helt annet enn klasseromsundervisning i ABC på barneskolen.
  112. Work against Nature's Law and you'll become Nature's outlaw.
  113. The import of the Illuminati may be over-stated, but the influence of the Illiterati is just f*cking astounding. — George Ure
  114. Writing a program is like writing a contract with the Devil. You'll get exactly what you asked for, not exactly what you wanted. — RabidRaindeer
  115. Inspiration is hard to come by. You have to take it where you find it. — Bob Dylan
  116. The major problem of life is learning how to handle the costly interruptions. The door that slams shut, the plan that got sidetracked, the marriage that failed. Or that lovely poem that didn.t get written because someone knocked on the door. — Dr. Martin Luther King
  117. Press any key to continue
    [A]
    Do you want to save the work done? [y/n]
    [N]
    Do you want to exit the program now? [y/n]
    [Y]
    (oops!)
  118. Om man nå likevel ikke skulle kalle en spade for en spade, bør man stadig ikke bli overrasket over at den er laget for å utføre gravejobber.
  119. «Visst Fanden skal der skydes med Skarpt!» — oberst Birger Eriksen.
  120. Det viktigste når man legger planer, er å huske hvor man har lagt dem. — Nattuglen
  121. Elwood (behind the wheel): It's 106 miles to Chicago, we got a full tank of gas, half a pack of cigarettes, it's dark... and we're wearing sunglasses.
    Jake (points ahead): Hit it.
  122. If you once tell a lie, the truth is ever after your enemy.
  123. Folk hadde atskillig erfaring også før i tiden. — Carl Hauff
  124. Vic: 30 comments on a thermocouple? Must be too hot to play outside.
    JDRM: We want thermocouples to measure how bloody hot this heat wave is!
    (from hackaday.com)
  125. Every paradise has its snake.
  126. God said, "∇˙εE = ρ, ∇˙B = 0, ∇×E = -∂B/∂t, ∇×B = μI + ∂(εμE)/∂t, " and there was light.
  127. The wavelength of a sound-wave in air at a frequency of some number of kHz is approximately the same as a radio-wave at a frequency of the same number of GHz.
  128. » Steen,
    Rigtig god bedring. Havde du glemt, sommeren er forbi, og politikerne havde stjålet den varme luft? « — tavsen fra Snaphanen
  129. Verba volant, scripta manent. (det talte ord forsvinner, det skrevne ord forblir) (words vanish but the written text remains)
    Compare: "If it isn't written down it didn't happen."
  130. Trains stop at a train station. Buses stop at a bus station. In front of me there is a workstation.
  131. We park in a driveway and we drive on a parkway.
  132. I burnt 1200 calories yesterday. I forgot to take the pizza out of the oven.
  133. Tips til dere som fryser hele tiden: Sett dere i hjørnet. Der er det alltid 90 grader.
  134. If I had asked my customers what they wanted, they would have said a faster horse. — Henry Ford.
  135. The only valid market survey is a signed purchase order. — G Philbrick.
  136. Det som er så bra med å bo på bygda er at hvis du ikke sjøl helt veit hva du driver med så veit iallefall resten av bygda det.
  137. The best tools should seek to amplify human judgment rather than futilely attempt to remove it from the process. — ESR
  138. Every child is an artist. The problem is how to remain an artist once we grow up. — Pablo Picasso
  139. It is frequently a question of improving the !/$ ratio.
  140. If you torture the data long enough, it will confess to anything!
  141. You can't fix stupid ... but you can incarcerate it
  142. Don't ever let anyone tell you that fairytales aren't real. I wake up every morning to drink a potion made from magic beans that bring me back to life.
  143. James Dean does not lean on a Gremlin. James Dean does not occupy the same portion of time and space as a Gremlin. Should his glance happen to fall upon one of those abominations his combined powers of coolness and ennui would cause the Gremlin to immediately vacate the entire known universe. It would disappear instantly down a wormhole into as yet uncharted dimensions of uncool; possibly to wind up in the reverse dimension (a place occupied by Devo videos on Betamax, restored Edsels, and RC Cola). It is fortunate for us that Mr. Dean was Spydered out of existence before he and the Gremlin could occupy the same timeline because some physicists theorize it would have initiated a repeat of the Big Bang event. (the Adaptive Curmudgeon)
  144. THE EARTH WITHOUT "ART" IS JUST "EH"
  145. It is too late: Not only has the horse bolted from the barn, but it has also sent a change-of-address notice from the next county over. Meanwhile the barn has burned down and they put up a shopping mall on the site.
  146. The optimist says the glass is half full.
    The pessimist says the glass is half empty.
    The engineer says the glass is twice as big as strictly necessary.
    The kitchen manager says the glass has to be washed after use.
    The cat says the glass is now on the floor.
    Excel says the glass is January 2
    The accountant says How much did all this cost, anyway?
  147. BREXIT sounds like it could be some kind of snack food.
  148. The Flat Earth Society has members all around the globe.
  149. An opinion without 3.14 is an onion.
  150. The fact that there's a highway to hell and only a stairway to heaven says a lot about anticipated traffic numbers.
  151. He who sleepwalks wakes up and needs coffee. He who sleeptweets wakes up to covfefe.
  152. After I drink coffee I like to show the empty mug to the IT guy to tell him that I have successfully installed Java. He hates me.
  153. Det som er viktig med graut, det er å ikkje gå rundt han, men ete han jamt og trutt.
  154. Kollektivtrafikk er noe som går fra et sted man ikke er til et sted man ikke skal.
  155. «Kabinettspørsmål» har forskjellig mening for radiohistorikere, vinkjennere, eller stortingsrepresentanter.
  156. It ain't what you don't know that gets you into trouble. It's what you know for sure that just ain't so. - Mark Twain
  157. Eksamenskandidaten fikk spørsmål om hva vakuum var for noe. Hun svarte, «Jeg er ikke sikker men jeg har det i hodet.»
  158. Papegøyesentraler: Medier som gjentar hverandres trivielle nyheter.
  159. Thermodynamikkens 1. lov: «Energi kan aldri oppstå eller tilintetgjøres men bare omdannes.»
    Hávamál 145: «Gave krev gjeving att.»
  160. Psykiaterne har undersøkt hodet, men der fant de ingenting.
  161. It doesn't really matter much what science says about [anything], because scientists constantly disagree with each other and today's latest research will be contradicted by a new study published tomorrow. Cautious skepticism toward claims of 'science' is really the most scientific viewpoint of all, but fools are not generally cautious or skeptical.
    (the other McCain)
  162. There are two reasons why some people don't mind their own business: 1. They don't have a mind. 2. They don't have a business.
  163. I've calculated my velocity with such exquisite precision that I have no idea where I am.
  164. An unemployed jester is nobody's fool.
  165. Every great cause begins as a movement, becomes a business, and eventually degenerates into a racket. - Eric Hoffer
  166. Kattene ble i sin tid dyrket som guder i Egypt. Det har de aldri glemt.
  167. It's so damned cold around here; I saw a politician with his hands in his own pockets.
  168. People are prisoners of their phones. That is why they are called cell phones.
  169. They all said "Learn to code!" so I learned how NPCs work. :D
  170. Så flate som TV-ene er nå, er det bare flyndre som duger som pausefisk.
  171. En «mattesensor» for en bilmekaniker er noe helt annet enn en «mattesensor» for en artianer på videregående skole.
  172. Silly putty implies the existence of serious putty. Such as C4....
  173. The problem with technological solution to political problems is that people expect technology to bend physics and thermodynamics to their preconceptions of what is "normal" or "right".
  174. "The D.C. Circuit" has different meanings for a lawyer and an electrical engineer.
  175. ultracrepidarianism: The habit of giving opinions and advice on matters outside of one's knowledge.
  176. An apple a day will keep anyone away, if thrown hard enough
  177. Hemmoroids are a pain in the ass.
  178. Roses are red, violets are blue. Unexpected '{' line 42. (pronounce the { character as "left-bracket")
  179. Et Spørgsmaal
    Hvorfor har man sindsygeanstalter?
    For at indbilde verden, at de mennesker, som i k k e er anbragt der, i k k e er gale. (Avisen «Valdres», 1906)
  180. This toilet paper is the John Wayne of toilet paper. It is rough, tough, and doesn't take crap from anyone.
  181. Nobody knows exactly who holds the patent for the fire hydrant because the patent office that held the records burned down.
  182. I gave all my dead batteries away today... Free of charge.
  183. I'm reading a book about anti-gravity. It is impossible to put it down.
  184. This U2 model GPS device is no good: it rattles and hums; the streets have no name, and I still haven't found what I'm looking for.
  185. It's Area 51 and it's Studio 54. These are not quite the same thing.
  186. Nothing that requires the labor of others is a basic human right.
  187. If it is made from a plant it is probably good. If it is made in a plant, probably not.
  188. Laundry is the only thing that should be separated by color
  189. Every male dog is a son of a bitch.
  190. I bought a box of animal crackers and it said on it "Do not eat if seal is broken." So I opened up the box, and sure enough...
  191. Da skjelettene forlot det synkende skip kom rottene ut av skapet. (Karine Haaland)
  192. It's Myers-Briggs and it's Briggs and Stratton. Not the same thing.
  193. A crank is a very elegant device. It's small, it's strong, it's lightweight, energy efficient, and it makes revolutions. — Fritz Schumacher
  194. Grammar: the difference between knowing your shit and knowing you're shit.
  195. Når en politiker snakker om at «vi er i samme båt« så se opp .... Det betyr at han vil være kaptein, og du må ro.
  196. It takes willpower and won't-power, as in "I won't {do|buy|eat} that."
  197. The problem with 'Quick-n-Dirty' is that 'Dirty' remains long after 'Quick' has been forgotten.
  198. Science is the process of data and deduction, refined over time.
  199. Technology is all smoke and mirrors. Break it, let the magic smoke out, and what remains is shiny and useless.
  200. Det begynner som satire, så blir det «konspirasjonsteori», deretter «spoiler warning» og tilslutt er det «noe alle vet».
  201. Knock knock! — "Who is there?" — "Bearing, Rod Bearing."
  202. The question was "How many feet in a yard?" So I went outside to the front yard. The dog came along and started barking at two magpies that were out there. Now, counting, I have two feet, the dog has four, and the magpies have two each, for a total of ten. There are thus 10 feet in my yard.
  203. Søppeldunk som vindstyrkeindikator:
    0. Står på plass.
    1. Lokket er blåst opp.
    2. Blåst overende.
    3. Blåst over til naboen.
    4. Blåst nedover veien.
    5. Blåst helt bort.
  204. Nei, stamcelle er ikke det samme som fast plass i fyllearresten!
  205. It's not that difficult to tell alligators and crocodiles apart. One will see you later, and the other will see you in a while.
  206. If all you have is a hammer, everything looks like a nail. All that your efforts will achieve, and what you will end up with, is a number of bent screws and some broken wood.
  207. Rage Against the Machine never specified what type of machine they were furious with but I reckon it was probably a printer.
  208. I called off work today with vision problems... as in, there is no way I can see myself coming in to the office today.
  209. The amount of energy necessary to refute bullshit is an order of magnitude bigger than to produce it. (Paul Kedrosky, via Paul Graham )
  210. The opposite of one bad idea is another bad idea. - John Michael Greer
    A virtue is not the opposite of one vice but the midpoint between two. — Aristotle
  211. The illusion of freedom will continue as long as it's profitable to continue the illusion. At the point where the illusion becomes too expensive to maintain, they will just take down the scenery, they will pull back the curtains, they will move the tables and chairs out of the way and you will see the brick wall at the back of the theater. — Frank Zappa
  212. I used to be a fan, but after this masterpiece I'm a whole air conditioner — Garycetc (Creep - Vintage Postmodern Jukebox Radiohead Cover ft. Haley Reinhart)
  213. In the UK they drive on the left. Where I live they drive on what's left.
  214. Respect people who wear glasses. They paid money to see you.
  215. Du må alltid ha en øl i kjøleskapet ellers blir det kjeskap og det gir jo ingen mening.
  216. Even a blind pig finds a stopped clock every now and then.
  217. A pizza of radius z and thickness a has a volume of pi * z * z * a
  218. It is by the juice of the coffee bean that thoughts acquire speed, the teeth acquire stains. The stains become a warning
  219. Outside of a Dog, a Book is Man's Best Friend. Inside of a Dog, It's Too Dark to Read. (Groucho Marx)
  220. Why it is called code: When code is written, only God and the programmer understand it. Six months later, only God.
  221. Where there's smoke, there's incomplete combustion.
  222. Oppslag:
    _________________________
    Klokkao ska stidlast
    1 time fram i natt!!!
    Skal stidlast fram frao klokkao 24.00 ti
    klokkao 01.00

    _________________________
    Vet ikke om jeg forstod så mye av dette. Skal vi sette opp stillas inatt og vil det bli servert kakao?
  223. When every man can live like a king, every man begins to see himself as a king. Before long he is taking hormones and demanding you call him a queen. — Zman
  224. Time flies like an arrow; fruit flies like a banana; Pigs fly when launched with sufficient momentum.
  225. That composer must have been a locksmith in a previous life because he loves key changes.
  226. Along with "Antimatter" and "Dark Matter", we've recently discovered the existence of "Doesn't Matter", which appears to have no effect on the Universe whatsoever.
  227. Elbil körde mot strömmen fick sladd och gjorde volt
  228. Elevators terrify me. I'm taking steps to avoid them.
  229. Justice is a dish best served cold. If it were to be warmed up it would be justwater.
  230. Algebra, I'm not interested in finding your X, and don't bother telling me Y.
  231. Your direction is just as important as your speed. A lot of people are going nowhere fast.
  232. We're all out of whack.
    More whack has been ordered.
  233. Det er mye fælt som er gjort i beste mening. — Ole Paus
  234. Eating too much cake is the sin of gluttony. However, eating too much pie is okay because the sin of pi is always zero.
  235. A gentleman does not motor about after dark — Lucas Industries
  236. Some people say their body is a temple ... mine is a bouncy castle.
  237. Reading to Paddington rail disruption continues...
    Well they should stop reading to the bloody bear and get the trains moving instead!
  238. It was a sad and disappointing day when I discovered my Universal Remote Control did not, in fact, control the Universe. (Not even remotely.)
  239. At the end of the day, we are all human beans.
    And together we will rice.
    Lettuce pray.
    Ramen.
  240. Whoever said: "Out of sight, out of mind" never had a spider disappear in the bedroom.
  241. This Bonnie Tyler model sat-nav is no good: it keeps telling me to turn around, and every now and then it falls apart. Would not recommend.
  242. Why do dogs float in water? Because they are good buoys.
  243. "Boiling the hell out of it." is apparently not part of the recipe for making holy water.
  244. If the printer's hostname is Bob Marley, don't be surprised when it keeps on jamming.
  245. Basert på den enorme mengden av potteskår alene, må vi kunne anta at det romerske imperiet muligens må ha vært det mest klønete imperiet i historien.
  246. On a package containing an angle grinder key spanner:
    Fengshi TOOLS
    KEYPARAAMOLAD
    FUNDRAISING IS COMMON
    * Made of albono steel
    * The black surface is reversed rust
    * It can take a long time
    * Amoladora measures: 4 5 6 7 "" "" 9"
    * Termico treatment
    * Mango plastion is comfortable
  247. The inventor of autocorrect has died. The funnel will be helped tomato.
  248. En person uten humor er som en vogn uten fjæring. Man blir støtet av hver eneste småstein på veien.
  249. Notice seen above a set of power and network outlets:
    Gentle reminder
    Please DO NOT put
    the spoon far even as
    decided to use even
    go want to do look
    more like.
    THANK YOU
  250. This made my day. It made my day miserable, but that is just a detail.
  251. De vanligste dødsårsaker i Odalen 1900— 1950:
    1. Gølvtrækk (44%)
    2. Gå utta lue (19%)
    3. Førr lite kaffe (11%)
    4. Hærm ælj (9%)
    5. Måtte hølle tale (8%)
    6. Førr mie kaffe (6%)
    7. Atal katte (2%)
    8. Tiskera (1%)
  252. The set of attendees used to be all "Who is who". They are now a bunch of "Who is that?"
  253. I want AI to do my laundry and dishes so that I can do art and writing, not for AI to do my art and writing so that I can do my laundry and dishes. — Joanna Maciejewska
  254. The Earth isn't flat. If the Earth were flat, the cats would have pushed everything off the edge by now...
  255. Klokkene på Ringerike ringer ikke derfor må Ringerike flytte til Romerike men Romerike rommer ikke Ringerike så derfor må Ringerike være der det er.
  256. Alle tenker på seg, Egon, det er bare jeg som tenker på meg. (Dynamitt-Harry) (og en boktittel av Sigrid Boo, 1934)
  257. Sign seen at a hotel
    IN ORDER TO AVOID
    THE CONTAGE RISK
    WE RECOMMEND TO OUR CUSTOMERS
    TO STOP THE LESS POSSIBLE
    BUFFET ROOM
    AND WITHIN THE LIMITS OF THE
    POSSIBILITIES TO PROVIDE
    TO PERFORM ROOM BREAKFAST
    THANKS FOR COLLABORATION
    A PERSON
    ONCE
  258. Santa has been reading all our posts. Expect to get a dictionary for Christmas this year.
  259. There is the right way, the wrong way, and the railway.
  260. Notice on a rechargable battery:
    Attention:
    Asking usage to specify the
    charger proceeds to refresh
    The attention defends the tide,
    strictlying forbid the short circuit
    Can't close to the fire source the
    in order to prevent occurrence
    Bang
  261. I never back out of anything. The beeping noise irritates me. (QC #3451)
  262. When being held down or ground down by some tyrant's boot, it matters little whether the foot inside that boot is the left or the right one.
  263. The difference between swine flu and bird flu is that one requires an oinkment and the other requires a tweetment.

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